It’s not all that often that I get time to work on my Lego, lord knows I love it and it’s a form of relaxation for me. Name a Lego box and I probably have it. Unopened. Begging to be put together. The honest to god truth? I suck at Lego building, I feel somewhat inferior when I go and watch another freaking YouTube channel which shows the fastest way to do a Lego build. Great way to show I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
Besides, what the hell is work life balance when I’m supposed to be reading comics or building Lego and other nerdy things for MY OWN YOUTUBE (Nerdy Vloggers and Rebecca A Emrich) channels?
You know… that money making thing where I promised myself I would actually build the darn Lego. I think I have a cold or some crap because what was I thinking? I don’t really build Lego all that well, and I much prefer to talk about the box, and maybe it’s maybe I’d do better if I marked out a bit more.
My blogs and my YouTube channels are supposed to be- in theory- my outlet, my joys and passions and also a way to grow as a person. It’s a new experience working on a part-time basis, and then it hits me. This is a job, a thing I am doing to build my collections, but also pay bills. It’s true that thing, the money thing. Makes the nerd in me weep. I could sit around and play video games but I suck at it. That and YouTube is filled with gamers who are much better.
I need to work on my Lego. It’s not a problem, it’s not a thing of lack of time, I suppose I could read more Harry Potter and figure out some magic wand thing to get my Lego Potter set built. I’ll be honest I’m probably too darn lazy to put up a YouTube and that’s a problem.
No time to play the blame game. I am supposed to work on Lego sets, or a blog post. I even have a buddy to keep me on track, and wouldn’t you know it, my lazy ass self if not publishing a blog post or a YouTube video on a more regular basis. That has to change. I have a reputation to change. Maybe if I work smarter. No, maybe if I take this as a part time job and actually keep on moving. One step at a time, and go from there. I can’t blame anyone. And after a bit of nerd like self examination, I’ve found I can use my rules I use in general with this one.
I know someone is going to kick my butt if I don’t keep the pace, and continue my business. The nerd in me needs to show off, and the business woman in me needs to prove that it’s not a problem with Lego, but a problem with how I view life.
When the problem is Lego, it actually really isn’t, it’s a life unexamined and a life where you can take being a need and a passion and make some money to pay some bills with it- if I wannabe a nerdy blogger. YouTube isn’t to blame about the new rules where you need A, B, and C to earn income- they are a business and I should stop thinking where the problem is.
Nerds will watch and help each other and be my guides, and I am hoping that this way we make a great community with a blog and a YouTube which is successful. No more excuses. I am responsible for my channels and my blogs.
And sometimes, the problem isn’t about Lego, it’s about me, and my lack of taking the whole adulting thing to the next level, and using it.